The need for specialised support

We are often asked by adopted people if we know of any counsellors or therapists that are themselves adopted people.

The number of these type of inquiries has increased since 2021 when the Ministry of Justice began its public consultation on adoption law reform and the Royal Commission of Inquiry into Abuse in Care (belatedly) began hearing submissions from people impacted by adoption.

Evidence backs up need for access to support for people impacted by adoption

The growing body of knowledge in neuroscience shows that early separation of mother and child has lasting impacts on the developing brain of the child and on the wellbeing of the mother. This evidence supports what adopted people know from their lived experience and have been telling us and government for decades. Adopted people’s challenges swirl around belonging, self-esteem, worthiness, trust, isolation, whakapapa and connection. When a person’s feelings aren’t validated, are dismissed or judged as incorrect it’s not surprising that people seek professional support from someone who understands adoption from a lived perspective. It’s not surprising either that adopted people are over-represented in statistics such as mental health, addiction, suicide, and drug and alcohol abuse.

You want me to tell you again? …then support me to do so!

Every time government asks adopted people and natural parents to make submissions on law reform proposals, the submitters do so believing their contributions will result in adoption law reform.  Yet the numerous attempts at reform have not brought about any legislative reform of the 1955 Adoption Act.

Engaging and re-engaging in successive law reform consultation process is re-traumatising for adopted people and their natural parents.

Not surprising then that people are asking for counsellors and therapists with a lived experience of adoption following their engagement in yet another adoption law reform process that appears once again to have halted (July 2023).

There is a point when requests to re-engage through public consultation exercises that result in no change, becomes abusive in itself.

Where can I find support?

There are now three in-person groups operating in Aotearoa/New Zealand. Details about the support groups can be found here.

While AdoptionNZ.com has no client reviewed list of counsellors or therapists, Jo Willis has published this list of NZAC Counsellors/Therapists currently working in the specialist area of Adoption on her website.

Where can I get funding for professional services or to run a support group…?

We are not aware of any funding available for people impacted by adoption who wish to access professional services or to set up and run a support group.

We need to keep reminding our politicians, health professionals and relevant government agencies of the kind of support services we need and the funding we need to access it.

Here’s information about contacting MPs in Aotearoa/New Zealand.